How serious artists prepare for the Venice Biennale

by the-biennial-project 22. June 2019 11:49

Let be honest here.

The idea of attending the opening week of the Venice Biennale can be pretty intimidating.

There’s the art of course.


And along with it come throngs and throngs of people. Good-looking, well-dressed people. Most of them are Europeans for god’s sake, with their good-health-care, bicycling-to-work, and months-off-hiking-in-the-mountains type lifestyles.


It was enough to make us want to stay home under our blankets eating Pringles.

But THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN WRONG, I TELL YOU WRONG! We were not about to rest on our considerable laurels when there was so much art to be seen and so many fabulous receptions to be attended!


We refused to let the scale (or time, or American health care) keep us from our rightful places frolicking with the well-healed and glamorous masses. No, we took control of the reigns of fabulousness, and dedicated ourselves in the weeks and months prior to our Venice pilgrimage to our task with our customary resolve.blog20

We got rid of the bad skin!


And those rotten wrinkles!


We committed ourselves to various scientifically proven replenishing regimes!


We adorned ourselves with the most glorious embellishments!


We polished our pearly whites until they sparkled!


We got the most perfect highlights in our hair!


We ironed our seductive yellow attire and painted our digits to match!


And most impressively, at least one of us did something of substance,


Losing SIXTY POUNDS in time for the trip!


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